Sunday, March 11, 2012


I believe that you can't measure and compare suffering the same way for any two people. Some people would have been granted the ability to overcome more obstacles than others. You could say that we have different thresholds for our sadness and our pain. The environment and one's upbringing would also have influenced their strengths to face adversity. People who have been through worst at earlier stages of their life would probably disregard a problem of the same gravity faced by someone else. Those in war-torn countries or those living in lands scarce of resources have faced such conditions their whole life but have gradually adapted themselves to cope. Though our problems would never outweigh theirs, the amount of pain and anguish you feel would probably amount to the same level.

The same would probably go for one's level of content. Though gifted with more skills, it may not mean they are happy. I believe I have been granted with a wee bit more talent in certain fields (and subsequently, way more ego).The achievements I've accomplished thus far may be enough to make others proud yet myself am not satisfied. The urge to do better provides one with the will to improve but it has culminate into a hunger that is never easily satiated. Sometimes I do wish I were more easily content. Though supposedly more gifted, it is not enough for success. And I still have to teach myself to settle for second best. Currently, this mentality of aiming for the top is causing myself a lot of doubt and conflict,making decisions that much more harder than they already are.

Last uni has not replied yet but wanted to blog this. And my ruler was left behind at the hotel. Sigh. Depressed.

(I would have written the english version of the blog title, which means ambition. But the chinese one has so much more aggression and emotion to it.)